Nice Girls Don’t Always Finish Last

Nice Girls Don’t Always Finish Last

What does it mean to be a “nice girl”? We are all aware of the discernible definition of a “nice guy”. To make a long definition short, – it is a “YES MAN”. In the same sense, a nice girl can associate herself with the same brief definition – a “YES WOMAN”.

A nice girl will do absolutely anything to make a man happy- In most instances, the man isn’t even “officially” hers and she is already giving too much, sacrificing too much and being too available too soon. What does this do? It allows the man to take advantage. Seeing as he knows he is getting this special treatment without even making the relationship official, he will automatically assume he doesn’t need to label it and will continue getting whatever it is he wants from the nice girl with no strings, obligations or expectations attached.

Without noticing it, many of us women fall into the realm of the “nice girl”. We become so entangled in the charm and delectableness of a man that we leave no room for spontaneity and uniqueness. We give it all up front without ever requiring him to do anything. A few nice words, small gestures and we are HOOKED. A nice girl falls for the simple things. She does not need much to be pleased. She wants to be needed and wanted and feels the only way to do that is to give a man whatever he wants. She has objections sometimes but she is just to “nice” to ever come out and speak her mind. She wants a relationship of course but she is just too afraid those concerns will ruin what she already has with him – which what she has is a man taking advantage of the way she loves.

Why am I so articulate on the motions, mind frame, mentality, and feeling of the “nice girl”? Because, like most women, I was one without realizing I was until it was too late and my heart was already in too deep!

Well, I am here to prevent that from happening to you my darling. Most of you are just too damn nice and putting up with far too much. First, you need to recognize if you are a “nice girl”.

Here are the 5 sure signs that you are a nice girl:

1. He goes out and you sit at home waiting by the phone for a call or text – Listen, do not let a man tell you “he hates when his woman goes out all the time etc.” If he goes out with his friends and expects you to sit at home this shows he has some security issues and wants you available to him at all times even though he is not available to you. Nip it in the bud. Let him know you have a little flair as well.
2. You pick up every phone call and answer every text message within 60 seconds of receiving it. – Again you are being AVAILABLE. This is not game playing here, this is making it known that you have a life and that you are not sitting by a phone waiting on him. This makes a man less likely to ever believe he can lose you. You want a man to be afraid to lose you because if he isn’t he will do whatever he wants KNOWING he will and can get away with it. Let him know you are not that NEEDY by ignoring a few phone calls sometimes and not rushing to text back. This is not always the case sometimes so pick and choose your battles.
3. You let him in your house at all times of the night – Ladies there should be a line drawn. If a man wants to spend time with you it should not consist of him coming to the crib during the late hours of the night for sex. This is decreasing your value. Require him to take you out during the daytime. Set rules and let him know that after certain hours of the night you are not to be bothered. You are not his booty call. If you want to be his woman you need to start acting like it!
4. You trip when he doesn’t answer the phone and then you continue to call back every 15 minutes. – This makes you look very NEEDY or in modern day terms, THIRSTY. A man should be chasing after you. It should not be another way around. If a man wants to spend time with you, he WILL. If he wants you around, he will have you around. He is the easiest to read because by his actions you can find out what he thinks of you, where you fall in his life and how he feels about the relationship as a whole. The fact that he sends you straight to voicemail and doesn’t call you until he wants that nightcap means he was doing his own thing during the day and you weren’t important enough to be included in it. Get smart! He will only treat you the way you allow him to.
5. You meet his needs without ever requiring him to meet yours – Ask yourself – “What does this man do for me that I cannot do for myself?” “What does he provide that I cannot provide to myself?” What is the use of giving your all to someone who cannot do for you what you cannot do for you? You know what this means? For most women who give themselves too much to a man who does not provide her anything worth having is a woman who is afraid of loneliness and will do just about anything to fill that empty spot in her bed. Do not be this woman. Learn how to be alone. It is better to wait for the right one than to waste your time, energy and emotions on someone who is just “ok” and “good for now”. Be so comfortable in yourself and confident in the love you give that you are willing to wait for the one deserving to receive it. Never settle for someone who is not meeting your needs. Be willing to wait for love.

So tell me – are you ready to take control of your heart? Are you ready to realize your worth and are you ready to stop allowing this man to decrease the value of your unconditional love? Not every man deserves all you have to give. Time to wise up and get love’s freeloaders out of your heart! They take, take, take and bring only misery, pain and dissatisfaction.